new year

It's the new year, and I'm sick of going backwards.

I'm sick of crawling back to things I've already done. I'm sick of dwelling on the old and ignoring the now. I'm sick of leaning on things that won't support me, of clinging, of being dependent. I'm sick of nostalgia, sick of dwelling on dog-eared, tired, old dreams, whose potential was never as great as I once thought, or tried to tell myself I believed. I was never really happy that way. Breathing in stale air never did do much for a person's health. Oxygen can't be recycled, unfortunately.

As I said,

I'm sick.

What's the cure?

A breath of fresh air. A step forward. A new beginning. Another chance to make things different than they were before. To make me different. I will be better, or at least try. I will try very hard.

There are books to be read. There are things to be done. There are stars just quivering with the effort of waiting to be touched. There is an eternal second chance. I must not be fool enough to abuse, or forget it. Not ever. Don't ever forget. Then life becomes dusty, pointless, and dark.
One last thing:

It's okay to go backwards if

You're going back to something good.
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I just had to tell somebody.